Juggling, balancing, and getting pulled in all directions...
I'm probably having a bit of a personal rant with this post. But I also hope it provides some kind of value if anyone reads it.
As a single, working mum - I am wearing many hats. I work part-time in an office, making outbound sales calls. I am at home part time; trying to haphazardly get as much housework done as I can, to be the best mother that I can, cooking meals, listening to stories, helping with homework and tending to bumped heads, grazed knees and breaking up squabbles between my two children. I am busting my tail to do entrepreneurial stuff in order to be able to eventually leave my job and work around the kids and help as many people as I can in the process. It is requiring all of my patience, willpower and determination to stay the course some days.
Earlier this week, a friend scoffed at the fact that a woman in their office in a similar situation to mine had remarked that she "just wanted a day to herself" - they didn't understand how they could possibly need a break when they 'only work part time'. I went IN. It got my back up something rotten.
We are all, as human beings, entitled to a break. But as a parent, I can totally empathise with this faceless woman that I've never met. The feeling of being halfhearted in each setting, not quite getting enough done, never really doing a complete job wherever you are, constantly playing catch up and always having someone who requires your attention or effort. I hope she gets that day to herself.
It's exactly why I encourage other parents to take time for themselves, to create space for self care and indulgence - even if it's just half an hour. We live in a world that requires us to be 5 people in 3 different places, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 52 weeks of the year.
It's okay just to be one person.
I'm taking steps to remove some of the physical clutter in my home as I've got an impromptu day of due to my youngest being off school. Removing some of the 'stuff' I'm responsible for should help me to feel less weighed down, it's less stuff to take care of, less stuff to think about, less stuff to be connected to, and ultimately a step closer to my goal of a calmer home, more peaceful workspace, and less things to clean!!
I've also been running a 'screen-free september' via my coaching page and that's shown me how much calmer my home can be, and highlighted what's really important to my family - it's not things, but time spent together. Time in the garden, time spent baking, running and riding bikes.
I don't need more money to be able to buy material things, but to be able to enjoy the freedom that can come with less stress. That is what I am working towards. So I may still be thrifty - but more so that I can relax and enjoy that time with my babies. Whilst they still want to enjoy time with me.
If anyone else is stressing about trying to be super mum - you don't have to be super mum, you are doing fine just being 'mum'. I salute you. I am here with you. We are doing our best.
And that is enough. X